1926 High School Graduation Will
Sent by
B Don Zesch <bdzesch@att.net>
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN:
I am an attorney by profession and make a specialty
of drawing a different class of wills. In the past years, so many of
the last wills of this school have been broken, the class decided to hire
an expert who could draw up such a document in a way that it would remain
intact through time and part way through eternity. It will be necessary
to levy a special assessment on the graduating class to pay the attorney
fee.
The senior class of this school realized that
soon it would cease to exist and as it possessed many treasures beyond
price that might cause conflict among those who desired to secure them, she
took a careful inventory and distributes them as follows, which is her last
will and testament.
Listen, one and all, while I read this
precious document.
We, the class of 1926, being about to cease
our existence as a class, being of sound minds, in fact, having well crammed
minds and superhuman understanding, with a memory that was never known to
fail, do make and publish this as our last will and testament.
To our highly respected faculty who have imparted
to us all the wisdom of the ages, we bequeath a sweet succession of peaceful
nights and dreamless sleeps. No longer need they spend the dreary hours
of darkness wondering whether their dear wards are pouring over their lessons
in geometry, reading the fascinating pages of English literature or
tripping the light fantastic to the frightful strains of jazzy music. It
is said that children are easy to manage in the first grade, but the difficulty
increases as the years go by during the grade they cannot be managed or controlled
by an power posed by man. For this reason we make the faculty the residuary
legatee of this will so each will have ample reward.
Also in recognition of their watchful care over
us we bequeath to our teachers the limitless knowledge and astounding information
that we have furnished them at various times in our examination papers. We
realize that many things we have imparted were entirely new to them and all
the rest of mankind. If this information could be spread to the uttermost
parts of the earth it might transform many benighted people so we hereby
authorize the faculty to spread this information wherever and whenever it
will accomplish the greatest good to the greatest number.
To our beloved superintendent we bequeath our
deepest reverence, our sincere affections and our heartiest gratitude. During
the years we have spent in this school he has taken the keenest interest
in our welfare as individuals and as a class so as a partial payment of the
debt of gratitude we owe him we give him a first mortgage on the glittering
reputations and stupendous achievements which the great mysterious future
has in store for us. May he watch with satisfaction every step of our
journey, each victory, each success and honor that we may win, but may his
eyes be turned the other way when we make failures or fall from the high
standards he has set for us.
To the Juniors we bequeath our senior dignity
and ask that it may be upheld with all seriousness and gravity in spite of
their light mindedness and irresponsibility. Also our places in class
room and chapel. May they fill them as promptly and as faithfully as
we have done. If inadvertently we leave any erasers, pencils or other
scholastic equipment we give to whomsoever can get them in the mad scramble
of the vociferous under-classmen. In some mysterious way these articles
which we have used may impart to them some of the great wisdom we have absorbed
in this institution of learning.
To our successors we leave our places in the
affections of our principal and teachers. They will love them even
as they have loved us and will show them all the tender kindness and attention
they have shown to us. The advancing class will appreciate this ever
as we have and at the close of next year will call down benedictions on those
who have worked so hard to develop their young minds and start them aright
on the great highway of life.
To various individuals we make these important
and generous Personal gifts, trusting they may be duly appreciated:
To Henry Rhode we bequeath Jack Jarret's ability
to lead the school singing.
To Jeff Kidd we give Elmer Wiedemans power to
please the girls.
To Virgil Banks we bequeath Rolands Grote's chance
to become President of the U. S.
To Mildred Montgomery is left Anna Ingrim's luck
in getting high grades.
To Nettie Schmidt we bequeath Ned Webster's desire
to become an old maid.
To Smith Lewis is given Clayton Schmidt's trick
of looking innocent when caught in mischief.
To Betty Barnhardt we leave Dena Hering's fondness
for the boys.
To Mary Capps is left Clayton Schmidt's
skill as an artist.
Olga Fay Wood bequeaths her leadership as pep
leader to Nettie Echert.
Ruby Pluenneke leaves her privelege of stopping
by the tailor shop to Ruby Grote, but understand there will be a new tailor.
Eunice Green bequeaths the presidency of the
Girls Athletics Asso. to Lucille Rody
Erna Witt leaves to Modell Henrich her coquettish
manners.
Anna Marie Koock bequeaths her charming personaltiy
to Vita King.
Lela Strackbein leaves to Benellen Land her desire
to be a good house keeper.
Frederick Gipson leaves his ability to play thye
guitar to Bevil George.
Garner Sequist bequeaths the privilege of staging
a fight in Senior English of '26 - '27 to Ernest Lemburg.
Estella Zesch bequeaths to
her ability to learn Trig., but advises her to "Never
give up the ship."
|